Thursday, January 29, 2009

Short Walks From Masscom to Palma Hall.





When I entered UP, one of the things I looked forward to were the boys. I thought, thank God, after meeting stupid boys in High school, I'll finally meet substantial ones in college and who knows, I might fall in love.

(Long Pause)

(the fan whirs, the floorboards creak, the sun sets)

Okay, so no one came. So a year before graduation, I have already resigned and accepted maybe I'll meet HIM at the work place.

But I guess God is such a good dramatist and story-teller. 'Cause for some unexplainable reason, YOU came into my life.

And because God mastered that in literature, the protagonist has to work his/her butt off, to get his/her happy ending, he decided....well, Alina, I won't make this easy for you.

So at first, as in all love stories, we meet. You were a Philosophy Major, a 'tambay' in AS/Palma Hall-- a heart throb, as cool as ice. I was a Film Major in Mass Com-- student council leader, running for honors, a real stuck-up.

I was domineering and had a strong personality.
You were passive, almost shy.

You were a bassist and a member of a band.
I was a singer and a member of a band/duo called AlinaNaiba.

You thought Paola Peralejo (my classmate then in Mandarin 100) was over-rated and bitchy.
I blushed when you said I'm prettier than her.

We were JUST ORGMATES. But it was a real blessing we were under the same committee. Cause otherwise, what could be our excuse for talking on the phone late at night? We were discussing layouts and copies of publicity materials, but deep inside, we wanted to know how many siblings we have, our birth dates, our interests, our crushes...

I remember now, vividly, our shorts walks from Masscom to Palma Hall. I remember deliberately trying to walker slower just to spend more time with you. I don't know if you noticed I often tied my shoe laces.

I waved a shy goodbye every time I was about to go to the third floor for my Chinese class. You said "ingat!" as you went back to your tambayan on the 2nd floor.

January 2005-- God decided it was time for the REAL DEAL. Sitting on a new sofa in Masscom, we confessed what we felt for each other. Then again, the Lord said liking each other wasn't enough for love. In the end, you told me we met too late 'cause your heart already belonged to someone else.

My heart bled.

That night, we walked together to the IKOT jeep terminal near Masscom. You bid a silent goodbye as I got inside the jeepney. You turned and walked away, as the jeep drove ahead. Please look, I muttered, please...just glance so I know I still have a chance...WE still have a chance.

But you walked straight ahead. I blinked back tears. It was the longest ikot jeep in my life.

Depression came. That included crying to five different people in a day. Staring off into space during thesis shoots. Writing poems, writing a song about you (which became a famous song by the way- Eyeliner sung by Armi Millare)

And just when I was already moving on, God made the unexpected happen. He let us meet again and made us feel something. That maybe, we can work it out. He might be the one. She might be the one. God gave our love story another chance.

I held my own, passed the test and got my happy ending.

Now, we're four years and counting, baby.

Up to now, I feel mesmerized by you. As if we just confessed to our crushes, as though we had our first kiss.

But it hasn't been a smooth-sailing ride. We've been through a lot. But the important thing is....we made it. There are more challenges to come. I'm sure we're all the more stronger for them.

From being strangers, to romantic partners, we've become the best of friends.

Alina and Sam. Sam and Alina. I can't imagine life without you.

Thank you so much for your unconditional love.

Happy 27th birthday!

Tuesday, January 27, 2009

Battling Insomnia

In my eyes,silhouettes
Bathing in the moonlight
My soul wandering
Battling imaginary fireflies...
Outside, I hear a siren's song
and two cat-lovers moaning, sighing,
Scratching at walls they cannot see...
I squint, suddenly,
at the sun's first wink.

*** Hayyyy..insomnia, insomnia....I need to sleep...:(

Sunday, January 25, 2009

PILIKMATA



This is one of the poems I wrote last 2005, dedicated to by "sungkiki"...heehee. He liked it so much he made a layout for it. :-)

Friday, January 23, 2009

Flashes of Red: a semi-short story

When Cara woke up, she saw red flashes.
The same bits of red you see when you look at the sun
So sudden, you get rashes
She dragged herself to the school fair that day
With nothing to look forward to.
At the kissing booth, someone dragged her
Her face red, acne-infested, the guy looked at her disgusted.
Paid a hundred bucks to escape being busted.
All around her, strips of red paper hanged
She picked some of them with her hand
Then walked by her lonesome to the place of the damned.
At the girls’ bathroom, it was her release
She cried in the toilet, streaks of confusion and grief.
When finally, she calmed, she washed her face
Washed her hands thoroughly with the paper strips
Then a thought came as fast as light—
As Cara stared at the red ink-stained sink.

SIGANGSUITOR: maikling kuwento

SIGANGSUITOR

Ang Sampaguita Street dito sa amin sa Pasig ay pugad ng mga retiradong lola’t lolo, mga apo nilang may mga asawa na, mga sales lady, mga tambay na tanghali pa lang tumotoma na, mga land-ladies ng nabubulok na mga apartments, at ang mga tenants nilang live-in status, mga estudyanteng makikita mong naka-puting blusa at polo, naglalakad papuntang Sta. Lucia Elementary School. At higit sa lahat, ito ang pugad ni Mac-Mac.

Maliit si Mac-Mac, maitim ang balat, makapal ang buhok at sarat ang ilong. Walang mag-aakalang siya ang numero unang siga dito sa Sampaguita.

Taong 1991 nang lumipat ang pamilyang Nograles sa Sampaguita – si Mac-Mac, ang Tiya Melissa niya at si Mang Dolfo, isang pulis na na-destino sa Pasig. Isang linggo pa lang ang nakakalipas nang kumalat sa kalye naming ang bali-balitang patay na ang tatay ni Mac-Mac, samantalang nagtra-trabaho bilang domestic helper ang nanay niya sa Italy.

Noong ika-labingisang kaarawan niya, nagimbita si Tiya Melissa ng mga bata sa Sampaguita Street. Dumalo ako sa isang simpleng handaan ng spaghetti, fried chicken at puto. Nakalaro ko pa ng siya ng Mario Brothers. Siya si Luigi at ako naman si Mario. Unang impresyon ko kay Mac-Mac, mukha namang mabait, pero parating nakakunot ang noo. Para tuloy siyang laging galit sa mundo.

Hindi si Mac-Mac ang orihinal na siga sa Sampaguita. Yung pinaka-kinakatakutan ng lahat – si Toto. Labing-tatlong taong gulang pa lamang, mukha na siyang mama. Kaya laking gulat na lang namin nung minsang nabalitaang napatumba ni Mac-Mac si Toto sa isang no-holds-barred na sapakan. Agad-agad, nawala sa trono si Toto. Duguan ang ulo, nailipat ang korona ng pagka-siga kay Mac-Mac.

Doon nagsimula ang Golden Age ni Mac- Mac. Tiningala siya ng mga siga ng Dame de Noche, Dalia at Ilang-ilang street. ‘Di nagtagal, nabuo ang barkada ni Mac-Mac, mga tinaguriang “untouchables” sa baranggay namin. Isang tropa ng lalaking tulog sa umaga, at gising sa gabi. Tumatambay sa isang warehouse sa Dama de Noche, umiinom ng alak, nagsisgarilyo, at marahil, patikim-tikim ng bawal na gamot.

Naalala ko, isang gabi, bago ako matulog, may narinig akong kalampag sa labas. Basagan ng bote, kaskas ng tsinelas sa kalye, at sigawan. Kinaumagahan, nabalitaang naming nagkaroon ng rambol. Tropa laban sa tropa.

Mga panahong itong labing-tatlong gulang na ako, pinagbawalan na ako ng magulang kong lumabas-labas. Natatakot siguro silang matulad ako sa mga kabataan ng Sampaguita.

Isang araw, lumapit sa akin yung isang tropa ni Mac- Mac. May inabot na sulat. Isang berdeng stationary na amoy cologne. Nakangisi yung barkada niyang umalis. Sa loob ay nakasulat: Dear You, hope you won’t get offend, but crush na crush kita. Can I get your phone number? I love you. Love, Mac-Mac. Naramdaman ko na lang na namula yung pisngi ko. Tinago ko ang sulat, at wala akong sinabihan tungkol dito.

Isang linggo ang lumipas, nang tinawag ako ni Tiya Melissa habang bumibili ako ng dirty ice cream. Nagyayang mag-merienda ako sa bahay nila. Pumayag naman ako. Nandoon si Mac-Mac sa loob ng bahay. Patingin-tingin sa akin. Nung iniwan ako ni Tiya sa hapag-kainan, ni hindi man lang siya lumapit sa akin para sumabay kumain. Pero nung nagpapaalam na ako kay Tiya Melissa, bigla na lang siyang sumulpot sa pinto. Hindi pa rin nakatingin sa akin, kinuha niya ang kamay ko, at inilapag ang isang kuwintas. Simpleng itim na tela ang kuwerdas. Pero ang hindi ko malilimutan, yung pendant. Plastic na puso, na may kulay pula na tubig sa loob.

Noong ika-labingapat na kaarawan niya, nagpadala si Mac-Mac ng tatlong ice candy, isang slice ng cake na may tatlong bulaklak na icing at tatlong white roses. Nalaman ng Mama at Papa ko kasi sila ang tumanggap ng mga regalo. Humalakhak si Mama, umasim ang mukha ni Papa. Agad agad kong sinabi kina Mama na wala akong balak sagutin si Mac-Mac. Una, bata pa kami. Pangalawa, bakit ko naman sasagutin ang isang siga?

Lumipas ang mga taon. Naging abala ako sa pag-aaral. Wala mang kaibigan sa Sampaguita, may mga naging kabarkada sa pribadong paaralan kung saan ako lumipat. May sumunod na rin akong manliligaw. Isang estudyate sa isang pribadong paaralan sa Pasig. Malayo man sa asal ni Mac-Mac, ay hindi ko pa rin sinagot.

Paminsan, makakasalubong ko lang si Mac- Mac. Pauwi ng bahay mula paaralan, makikita ko siyang nakatambay sa kanto, naninigarilyo. Iba na ang itsura niya. Tumangkad, pumayat, tumangos ang dating sarat na ilong. Madungis, at may manipis na bigote. Bali-balita, napatalsik siya sa paaralan, dahil sa pagkalulong sa droga. Anim na taon na ang nakakalipas, pero siya pa rin ang numero unong siga sa Sampaguita.

Prologue:

Ngayon, 25 taong gulang na ako, parehong edad ni Mac-Mac ngayon. Matagal na silang lumipat ng bahay at umalis ng Sampaguita. Ang huling rinig ko, nasa rehab si Mac-Mac.

Minsan, sumagi na sa isip ko, paano kaya kung sinagot ko siya noon? Ano kayang buhay niya ngayon? Ano kayang buhay ko?

Paano nga kaya kung naging kami ng numero unong siga? Dadaplis ang isip ko dito, tapos mapupunta na sa ibang bagay.